September 17, 2008
I have a few jokes about unemployed people
…..but none of them work.
Will glass coffins be a success?
…..Remains to be seen.
What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
…..One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.
Two windmills are standing in a wind farm.
One asks, "What's your favorite's kind of music?"
…..The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
…..There's no menu - you get what you deserve.
I went to buy some camouflage trousers yesterday,
…..but couldn't find any.
What do you call a bee that can't make up its mind?
I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage.
…..I lost my case.
Is it ignorance or apathy that's destroying the world today?
…..I don't know and don't really care.
I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant,
…..but then I changed my mind.
I saw an ad for burial plots, and I thought:
…..That's the last thing I need!"
Sleeping comes so naturally to me.
…..I could do it with my eyes closed.
What do you call a super articulate dinosaur?
You're not completely useless,
…..you can always serve as a bad example.
I broke my finger last week.
…..On the other hand, I'm okay.
Don't spell PART backwards.
…..It's a trap.
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland?
…..Well, the flag is a big plus.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda?
…..He was lucky it was a soft drink.
To the mathematician who thought of the idea of zero.
…..Thanks for nothing!
Son: "Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"
…..Dad: "No sun.
"For the needy, not the greedy"
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