My young grandson was visiting for Christmas and, out of the blue, he asked me how old I was. I told him 75. He was very quiet for a moment, and then he asked, “Did you start at one?” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Answering machine menu all Parents […]
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A group of men and a group of women were given a piece of paper and a pencil and asked to write down what gender they thought a computer might be, including four arguments to back up their reasoning. The men’s group decided that computers
I was at an Indian restaurant the other night and ordered the curried pelican. The meal was very nice but the bill was enormous!! A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She reduced altitude and spotted a man below. She descended
EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN! – OPEN TO MEN ONLY – ALL ARE WELCOME Note: Due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants. The course is over two days, and topics covered in this course include: HOW
I would love to take credit for this brilliant piece of satire but it was actually written by British funnyman John Cleese — circa 2011. The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Libya and have therefore raised their security level
John Cleese: Countries’ Responses To Imminent Threats Read More »
My neighbor knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that… 2:30am!!! Luckily for him I was still up practicing with my Bagpipes. The Department of Labor claimed a small soybean farmer was not paying proper wages to his help, and so
An Irishman, a Priest, and a blonde walk into a bar. The bartender turns around and says…. “Is this some kind of a joke?” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A nun has the unusual trait of walking around in the nude whenever she is alone in her little apartment
A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house… he got the outside. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two buddies are on a hunting trip together. They are walking through fields, up and down hills when one of them suddenly clasps at his chest
A police recruit was asked during the exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother-in-law?” He answered….”Call for backup.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Paddy and Mick are out fishing on the lake in a hire boat. They have been all over the lake
I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave. As I was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a coffin, 2 hours later and they’re still walking about with it. I thought to myself… they’ve lost the
Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend to Husband and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the Flower and Jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend. In addition, Husband uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance and Personal
My wife thinks I’m too nosy. At least that’s what she wrote in her diary. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two hillbilly brothers called Davo and Jimbob operate a small business hiring out canoes for an hourly rate at a local lake. It’s Davo’s job to collect the money
Star Wars: Bad Lip Reading The following videos take original Star Wars clips with original characters but change the dialogue into something altogether different. Funny and irreverent, the audio syncing is tremendously well done and the voice impersonations equally so. Not only very clever but
Star Wars as You’ve Never Seen it Before (videos) Read More »
A picture is worth a thousand words! I only write about my personal experiences and I seem to running out of them. I’m still fixing computers of course but it seems mostly to be the same old, same old. So this time I’m just going
