The Best SatNav System Ever?

“I have a little Satnav, It sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver’s friend, it tells you where you are.

I have a little Satnav, I’ve had it all my life
satnav systemIt’s better than the normal ones, my Satnav is my wife.

It gives me full instructions, especially how to drive
“It’s sixty k’s an hour”, it says, “You’re doing sixty five”.

It tells me when to stop and start, and when to use the brake
And lets me know that it’s never ever safe to overtake.

It tells me when a light is red, and when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively, just when to intervene.

It lists the vehicles just in front, and all those to the rear
And taking this into account, then specifies the gear.

I’m sure no other driver, has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car, it still gives its advice.

It fills me up with counseling, each journey’s pretty fraught
So why don’t I exchange it, and get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house, makes sure I’m properly fed
It washes all my shirts and things, and keeps me warm in bed!

Despite all these advantages, and my tendency to scoff,
I only wish that now and then, I could turn the beggar off.” ~~<origin unknown>

I do apologize to all our female readers for publishing this little ditty, it has nothing to do with male chauvinism, I just thought it was pretty clever. Although, I have been thinking lately of trading my old satnav in for a new one. ūüôā


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About the Author

Jim Hillier

Jim is the resident freeware aficionado at DCT. A computer veteran with 30+ years experience who first started writing about computers and tech back in the days when freeware was actually free. His first computer was a TRS-80 in the 1980s, he progressed through the Commodore series of computers before moving to PCs in the 1990s. Now retired (aka an old geezer), Jim retains his passion for all things tech and still enjoys building and repairing computers for a select clientele... as well as writing for DCT, of course.


  1. Just reminds me of , “Mind the pedestrian, Richard”, Hyacinth Bucket in the car with hubby Richard in the TV series, ‘Keeping Up Appearances’.

    Thanks Jim,


    • LOL. Me too Jonno. The only reason I didn’t mention it was because I thought it may be a little too obscure for many readers, especially in the US.

  2. Hi Jim,
    There is an Off Button. It is labeled “Divorce”. Its effectiveness is questionable and in extreme cases may not work at all.

    There are other instances of such buttons on devices. For example, there is a Brightness Button on television sets, but it doesn’t work.

    Good one!

  3. Jim,

    They have re-runs of ‚ÄėKeeping Up Appearances‚Äô all the time on our “PBS” station here in North America, most Americans love British, Australian, New Zealand etc. shows and movies.


  4. Thank you Jim for putting a little Sunshine and laughter in this Sunday. It even brought a smile to My passenger seat GPS.
    I still prefer her directions to what I often hear from that thing attached to the windshield – “Recalculating”