EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN! – OPEN TO MEN ONLY – ALL ARE WELCOME
Note: Due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants. The course is over two days, and topics covered in this course include:
- HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS
Step by step guide with slide presentation - TOILET ROLLS – DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?
Roundtable discussion - DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR
Practicing with hamper (Pictures and graphics) - DISHES & CUTLERY – DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?
Debate among a panel of experts - REMOTE CONTROL
Losing the remote control – Helpline and support groups - LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS
Starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while ranting – Open forum - EMPTY MILK CARTONS – DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?
Group discussion and role play - REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST
Real-life testimonial from the one man who did - IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS?
Driving simulation - HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION
Relaxation exercises, meditation, and breathing techniques - REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU’RE GOING TO BE LATE
Bring your calendar or PDA to class - GETTING OVER IT – LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME
Individual counselors available
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This is scary. Is the tutor male or female?
And can we have a class to teach women that all men don’t fit the above-listed stereotypes?
Well Tony, I fit 7 of the above-listed stereotypes myself.
I believe there could be an equally stereo-typical list produced about women but I don’t know of a man who’d be brave enough to publish it… certainly not me. 🙂
I’m good on 6 of the listed items, and 3 of them don’t really apply to me, so I just need classes on the remaining 3.
And yes, I know men aren’t allowed to criticize women, but we must meekly accept all they say about us.
Don’t see how to type a smiley on this page, but I’m not angry. Seeing lots of humour here.
To type a smiley- type a colon : followed by a closing bracket ) = 🙂
To type an unhappy face- type a colon : followed by an opening bracket ( = 🙁
Ha–so true, Jim!
Dear Jim
Hilarious! Much needed course. There are semester exams? A Phd is awareded?
May I use this in my free monthly e magazine Seniorgiri? If you send an your email I will forward a copy to you.
Plesae send me a photo and small bio if you agree.
Thanks in anticipation
Hey Shobha,
Of course you can use it, no problem. Just include a link this article and it will automatically include my photo and BIO.
Hi Jim
Thanks for the permission
I will add the link, but it is my practice to print photo and bio with the article, so if you could send..
How do I send a copy to you?
Just take a screenshot of the photo and BIO at the bottom of the article.
You can contact me via the “Ask an Expert!” link in the menu across the top of the page. Submit the contact form and I shall reply with my email address.
Does this by any means refer to the woke cultural movement? Although, according to
my wife I belong to most of what is listed, but what does a woman know.
TOILET SEATS – DO THEY MAGICALLY LOWER THEMSELVES AFTER YOU WALK AWAY?
Nice one Steve. 🙂
Kind of sad some men are that way. And some women might also see themselves too, Mindblower!
This is hillirious!
We are all descended from early cave-dwellers and a lot of these “faults” identified in Men by Women are not faults at all. It’s in our genes and designed by Nature to keep us safe.
Men are programmed to regularly go out hunting for days on end to provide for the tribe – desperately trying to bring down a buffalo, deer or wild boar to feed everyone. We are simply not designed to spend too much time in the “cave”.
One of women’s biggest complaints is that Men don’t communicate their thoughts and feelings. Well of course not. When you are out hunting a dangerous animal and every breath may be your last, you say things like – “It’s over there”, “It’s about to attack”, “you go that way and I’ll go this way – surround it and kill it”. There is no time nor need to describe what shade of colour it’s hide is and whether it will “team” with the colour of the wall drawings back at the cave. We Men are programmed by nature to communicate the simple and basic essentials for survival.
Meanwhile back at the cave, the Women didn’t have too much to do for hours on end apart from minding the children, cooking meals and decorating the cave with pretty pieces of tree bark and leaves generally talking up to, and in excess of, 16 hours a day to fill in time waiting for the Men to return. Through evolution they became genetically programmed to converse constantly and focus on small and mostly irrelevant detail.
When Men finally returned to the cave after dragging a huge carcase with them for days though thick snow and ice, exhausted and tired, they expected a bit of ego-stroking praise for a dangerous job well done, a huge meal cooked for them without lifting a finger whilst relaxing with mates with time now (accompanied with a few quite cave brewed alcoholic beverages). Time now to relive the dangers and excitement of the hunt that women couldn’t appreciate and to enjoy some quiet peace without having to worry if a predator was stalking them day or night. They didn’t want to have to engage in inane conversation answering questions about how pretty was the snow on the trees, listen to the mean things Wilma had done to Betty in their absence, be nagged about fixing broken artefacts before dinner (“that flint is blunt again”), picking hunting clothes up off the floor or worrying about being careful not to slop a bit of pig’s blood over her best fur.
I could go one but you’ll no doubt get my drift as the basic principles haven’t changed. We should have kept ’em at home in the cave where they are best suited. It all went south when we allowed them out of the cave to join in the hunt. Now it suddenly matters whether your arrows match your quiver, if you are wearing your best hunting sandals or your dried berries are gluten-free . And instructional training on how to best avoid a marauding wolf-pack intent on tearing everyone’s throats out is suddenly mansplaining and sexist.